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Tuesday, November 24th, 2009
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3:11 am - Shower of thoughs
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It was that time again. I felt dirty and needed a good shower. I undressed and walked to the shower, turning the mixing knob to the middle position where I left it there for some seconds before warm water start running from the head. I stepped in and closed the door before I directed the water jets towards me.
This was it. Time froze. Shockwave traveled throught my body. I closed my eyes. Thousands of droplets hit my skin like a frenzied drummer stick. I saw flashes. Thunder of pleasure ran along my spine. I breathed in slowly. I could feel every drop hitting me. The sound of a waterfall going over my body. I moved my head under the stream. Sounds became muffled. I bathed in it. My body shivers. My breath grows faster. I quickly pressed a hand against the wall to avoid tipping over.
My breath slowed down. The climax was over.
The water still glided freely on me, the warm feeling of protection surrounded me and the pleasure was still as intense, I grabbed the soap and washed myself.
current mood:  artistic
current music: Water drops
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| Saturday, November 21st, 2009
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1:42 pm - addendum
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Forgot to mention in the last update, that I'm going to Germany next week to visit a friend who invited me to go to opera.
And also, since truck driving job is dead, I decided to move on and get a computer training, the MCDST (microsoft certified desktop support technician). I got accepted at first glance. When I came back to bring papers to register fully, the person said they'd try to get me in next week, to which i replied that I already told the person at the interview I'd be in Germany and not available until the week after. She said "ooh, that's even better! see, we have to set people one by one and we wanted to set others before you because they need to miss as few classes as possible. As for you, we noticed that you wouldn't be bothered by that". In other word, I can make it without even thinking of it... Sounds like something I heard already. (last time for riding lesson, and for high school diploma).
current mood:  awake
current music: TV
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2:37 am - Update
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I thought I had updated here earlier...
So here's a summary of november.
I went for a blood test when someone became mad and ripped off my car mirror. I don't want to go into details. So two days after I went to BMW for the repair and found out that two weeks later they'd have high end cars to test for consumers. I applied to it and asked to reserve a spot for the BMW M3. A V8, 4 L engine capable of 420 HP and 0 to 60 in 4.2 seconds.
I had a pilot with me who demonstrated the power of that car on small roads and things possibles with it. We ended at 100 mph in sharp curves. After that I got to drive it for a bit and indeed it's like boring at 60, he asked me to press the (M) button and I hit 100 in mere seconds, it was quite fun.
photos here: http://www.flickr.com/photos/delphineuni/sets/72157622764665380/detail/
Then with a friend we went to a rc model meeting, it was cool to visit. there was a 24 hours mini Z race with fog and night race. Well the night race didnt even last minutes. I guess they found out the mini z lights are not good enough for that. There was demonstrations of buggies on mud, and a basketball indoor was prepared for demos of hot baloons and planes and helicopters. The helicopters photos are quite bad, it was very hard to follow them and the light was great there.
here are the pics of the meeting: http://www.flickr.com/photos/delphineuni/sets/72157622644767941/detail/
Then we went with the guy who lives with us to check a Mini Cooper S (175 HP) which he decided to buy. it's the high end sports model after the John Cooper Works. So I got to get the wheel after him and decided to test it as the sports car it is, just to hear that I should drive it this way when we get it after we came back home. Fuck man, it's a sports car, this asshole is 60 and cant even drive. At least, if he complains it uses lots of gas I'll push it in his face that he should have gotten a diesel not a sports car.
I also received my new Dell laptop at the end of october, it's quite a good machine with a T9600 (core2duo 2.8 GHz) and 4 GB DDR3, for a 500 GB HDD and a Radeon HD4670. The kickers are the blu-ray player, the tv card and the rgb led backlight of the 1080p panel.
And then to finish this, on the same day as I changed my mirror, I got a missed phone call. As I listened to my messages, I found out it was french Marineland HR phoning me saying she got my resume, that she didn't have spots for now but wants to keep in touch and gave me her email saying she'd love to meet whenever I visit the park (which I'm trying to plan: 700 miles away). And then she said she kept my resume in the list of experienced trainers. So I sent her an email back and will keep in touch with her hoping much from this.
current mood:  okay
current music: Star Trek Voyager theme
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| Monday, October 19th, 2009
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4:22 pm - Self-Awareness
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During the last months (years?), I have totally forgot who and what I was. I have been going up and down mostly depressed and going from toy to toy to try to get some more happiness.
I forgot the steps I took for last 4-5 years to become the real me. To fully be a girl, I even went as far as forgetting my medication for an extended period of time. But recently I found myself again and realised that during all those years, I could have saved a penny here and there to reach the necessary funds I need for my surgery, this money I spent left and right thinking how such a small sum wasn't going to be needed. But I was wrong. I hope to be able to get this money for the incoming year 2010, I'll try my best to because that's what I always wanted and that's what my life and sanity depends on, it is not an easy goal but if I don't start now, I'll never reach it. I'm pondering selling my motorbike to get some money back although most of it will go to pay its loan first...
I'll hold onto that hope as long as I can, until I finally get the whole sum together, whatever the way to do it, penny by penny if I have to.
current mood:  hopeful
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| Sunday, September 27th, 2009
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9:46 am - On other news
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Well, I hope to have a camcorder for christmas but it will have to wait.
My laptop died just two days before my desktop said it had enough.
The mobo died, it doesnt even load the BIOS, and I don't have error codes as I should in those conditions. I managed to get a sata usb enclosure for the hdd and it works as external now.
So I decided to ask for a laptop for christmas instead of a camcorder.
Will see how things go.
current mood:  calm
current music: Ben 10
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7:28 am - New desktop
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My old desktop started to die on me a few days ago: blue screen, hdd continuously working for no apparent reason and difficult boot, sometimes locked at the test screen.
At the same time, I got a commercial in the mail for the 50 years of a supermarket and in it an ad about a new desktop:
- CPU: Intel Core2Quad (2.33GHz) (yes, quad core!, although this one is the smallest they made and has low cache memory, it is still VERY fast)
- RAM: 8 GB of DDR3, 1066MHz
- 1000 GB HDD, 7200, Sata II
- new Nvidia GT 230, 1.5GB (officially unreleased)
- and a nice 23" 1080p screen.
All for 700.-
Yeah I know, if you check those specs, they are not the highest specs you can find but it was a bargain and it does pretty well, never saw photoshop opening in less than 5 seconds before :p
And I'm pretty happy with it, so that's enough ^^.
current mood: happy
current music: Porky Pig on TV
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| Sunday, August 30th, 2009
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5:51 pm - Welcome Oxo!
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Today we went to a sort of meeting for dogs, you know with breeders and people selling stuff unrelated.
Well, we found a guy who had ferrets and so we got one!
here's Oxo: http://delphineuni.free.fr/DSC_0775.jpg
Evan has a new friend :).
Well at first he wasn't really happy, he reacted like we were about to toss him and prefer the new ferret, but got better after he had his good share of hugs and scritches.
Oxo is rather nice and doesn't really bite which is surprising for a 3 months ferret. Although he has no vaccine nor chip so tomorrow I'm going to call the vet for that and papers.
He is a stomach on feet, he hasn't slept a second but ate all he could find since he is here.
Somehow he is really talkative which Evan stopped being, my fault as he has been alone for such a long time. I was surprised by his noises at first since Evan only does those when hurt or in bad situation. Oxo seems to do those when happy. Will have to be careful.
For now Evan is the biggest one but in a few months, it will be challenging to tell which is which, Evan has white feet and white head with a pink nose while Oxo has black feet and darker head and a darker nose.
They have been together almost since we arrived and well, let's say Evan hasn't yet been able to sleep ;).
Fights are playful and there's no fear to have really but for a few days I'm going to keep them in separate cages when I'm not at home.
We also saw baby Siberian Huskys for 600€ each. Mom told me to decide which xmas gift I'll have :p.
current mood: happy
current music: Dooking Oxo
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| Saturday, August 29th, 2009
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9:21 pm - Bday wish
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| Saturday, August 22nd, 2009
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7:04 pm - Legs are shaking..
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From the second day flying my rc helicopter.
Well, technically, it's the first day, since the last time I spent the whole battery time checking and trimming and had unsolved problems like the training kit I made got always caught in holes in the grass and such.
So today I took it out for the second time, trimmed a good way to the right and it hovered like a charm. My training kit was put to good use and I managed a flight as long as 90 seconds. Which could have been longer but I was so stressed, and worried about breaking something I thought it was good to end it, repositionned the heli in the middle then start again. You are never too safe. I managed a few soft landing as they all should be but the last one was a bit too sharp and I heard a soft 'bang'. Turned throttle off quickly then went to check the heli. The tail boom has a good mark on it and one of the blade has the plastic covering off of the wood. I tried to put some throttle to check the sanity of the blade (not full speed!) but the sound that came out of the plastic made me shut it off as soon. Decided to wait for advice or replacement before next flight. The wood of the blade itself is not even dented, although the plastic being off might make it good for trash.
All in all, I'm very happy on how I flew it, those simulator lessons were really helpful. The heli is reactive enough to act almost as soon as input the commands also, as soon as I wasn't sure of myself, like if it was getting too close from trees or else, I turned off the throttle at a reasonable distance and moved the heli by hand back to the middle. I hope to be soon able to do more than hover with it, it's really awesome!
current mood:  excited
current music: heli's rotor
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| Sunday, August 9th, 2009
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4:45 am - Zoo
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| Monday, July 27th, 2009
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1:12 am - Bleh
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You know there's something seriously wrong about you when:
- you are invited to a friend's party, being thanked for all you did to help those guys, enjoy the party and be nicely greeted when leaving and then...
All you think about is every little mistake you COULD have done that would make others think bad of you...
current mood:  blah
current music: laptop fan
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| Friday, July 24th, 2009
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7:47 pm - Short Rant
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What the fuck is wrong with people posting 2 MB thumbnails without a cut on lj communities?
Some people don't want to load your stuff man!
current mood:  bitchy
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(7 comments | comment on this)
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| Friday, July 17th, 2009
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8:33 pm - Happy Belated Anniversary
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| Thursday, July 9th, 2009
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6:18 pm - It says "Good"
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I've been waiting to receive my diploma since last week. As nothing happened, a friend decided to go on the minitel (the internet ancestor) to check out for me. I didn't know I'd be listed there as it is a GED stuff and not a big High School Diploma.
So he found my name and if I passed or failed.
So I passed!
And in France there are 'honours' given to students depending on their marks. Mine was "Good" (wikipedia ranks it as High Honour, the others being Fair 'enough to pass', Good Enough 'honours' and Very Good 'highest honours'); That correspond to a mark between 14 and 15.99 out of 20 (which is roughly equivalent to B in USA).
I have yet to know my exact mark.
I iz happy ^^
EDIT: I just found out the diploma I got is quite different from the US GED as the exams were exactly the same as HSD (math exam even included Integration), just less matters to pass. No offense to anyone having a GED.
current mood: crazy
current music: J'ai Dix Ans - Alain Souchon
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| Saturday, June 27th, 2009
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11:44 pm - Stolen from ![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif) orcinus
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Your result for The Mind Self Control Test...
MasterMaster Mind! 
Well what can I say! You probably don't need any advice about any of this. You are active in your own thought process. You are probably well focused. You are self conscious and take action consciously. You are aware of the nature of cause and effect (at least as this applies in a temporal environment... B). You know what your goals are. You don't allow your strengths to dominate your weaknesses. You cultivate balance and harmony in your thought process. You strive to maintain objectivity. You realize the difficulties involved in doing so. You understand that there are always different perspectives other than your own.
Take The Mind Self Control Test at HelloQuizzy
Yeah... so they say...
current mood:  not happy
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| Tuesday, June 23rd, 2009
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11:12 pm - stolen from selth
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| Sunday, May 31st, 2009
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8:29 pm - News
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I haven't updated my LJ this last few days, so let's start with thursday:
After a correct sleep, i get a normal breakfast which I'll find too heavy for a day-long scuba diving. Will have to be careful with that next time. Fill up the car tank since I don't want to go in someone else's car, not that i don't want to but I don't have money to pay for the travel. On other hand I don't push others to pay me back when they ride with me.
The guy I drove to the diving place was really nice and we talked for a while, first time I meet a professional helicopter pilot.
Somehow we are late because we expected someone else to come with us and in fact, this person went there already, so we had to hurry to change of clothes and wear diving gears, they are cool but really tight around the ankles and wrists. There was much wind and the first diving site was abandonned because there was no way to stabilised the boat with the strong currents, so we go to another place. All is good but I start to feel seasick, I know it will pass as soon as I'm in the water. So we start diving, as usual I'm slightly underweighted, my fault, but not by much. Fortunately I'm not as stressed as a few dives ago when I used half my tank just to dive down to 20 meters. This time I used only 10 bars, which is just ten times less. I'm a lousy diver, I'm not fit and I spend a whole tank while others spend only half of it. I showed the director when I was half and when I was in the red. I knew I could have confidence in him but for no apparent reason I had a panic attack underwater. I wanted to remove the mask and the breather from my mouth, I wanted to throw everything and just dive up to the surface as fast as possible. My old teacher told me about it when i first started to dive, not sure if it's a common stuff though but I managed to control myself. I guess my will is strong enough, cause after we landed, and I told my director about it, he said there was nothing visible in my acts underwater that showed any problem. Although I thought it was good to tell them.
Anyway, we finally reach the surface after this first dive and my tank shows less than 20 bars. And we surfaced like 200 or 300 yards from the boat with opposite currents. At least, the waves helped some and I swam more with each wave to gain from them, it took quite a while to get to the boat, but it was good not to be alone, then we had to remove stuff while holding the boat with one hand, my weight belt turned and I didnt thought of turning it underwater, so my director helped me, I turned facing the water, with my arm twisted and holding the boat, fighting to stay still as he asked me to :p.
From now on, my strenght was limited to the minimum, but I still had to get back into the boat, thanks to my fellow co-divers, it went easily but I was feeling pretty bad, a mixture of seasickness, dizzy head from too much effort, empty stomach and reminiscent of fear from underwater, or rather trying to understand it. I laid down on the boat floor until we arrive, I was cold and shaky (not visibly so though), of course I covered myself but the wind didnt help. We ate and I told the boss, I won't go to the next dive, he said ok but my dive director talked me into it, since I started to feel better after a small sandwich.
The second was rather uneventful; there was no current there, my tank went down as fast as before but we saw lots of interesting animals, like lobsters, tiny sharks, crabs, spider crabs, lots of fishes and even a torpedo ray, first time I ever saw one live.
Then it was time to drive home, I drove the guy back to his car and he gave me 10 bucks for the ride (I don't ask for those but it's the second time and the first guy calculated that's what my car costed me for the ride, so heh.).
Had enough time to shower and even rest a bit in it. Tiredness started to fit in but managed to go to school, and spend the two hours of course without a problem, thanks to the talented teacher. (One of them is so boring, he'd put me asleep even if I was on high-level cafeine). She told me something I heard when I was in school twelve years ago and which is still true:
I have the knowledge, I have the brain but I lack the way to explain it on paper in a scientific way (developping an explanation with details down to the conclusion).
Then comes friday, not much happened then, I tried to ride my bike but everyone decided to go on weekend at the same time, I drove like 40 miles in 2h30. Ordered two pizza, a special IE8 (yes the shop makes a internet explorer 8 pizza!) and a nutella one. The IE8 is really good but the other one is just a pasta fold in two with the nutella in it, the pasta was already getting hard as I got it, havent touched it since, will see if I can get it softer.
Saturday: naught.
Sunday: that is today. I went for a long ride, everything went well, 2h30 of ride, my ass just couldnt handle more, so I stopped under the sun for half an hour, no one to bother me it was really cool and then rode again, for almost another hour. It could have been the perfect if not 500 yards before my house, at a traffic light, I encountered a problem:
My light turned green, so I start, I got my sign to turn left, which means everyone coming in front has the right of way, in front there are two separate lanes with one light each, one lane goes straight or left (from their pov), the other goes right, ie: my right.
No car on the first lane, but one at the second, I start slow, cross the street slowly waiting for the car to move since I'm not sure if her light has turned green or not, I still go slow waiting for it to go then decide she might be red and starts to accelerate
...And so she does...
I was relatively far (not 100 yards though) from her, I braked hard, my rear tire slid a bit (might have been on the crossing lines). And I yelled at her.
The old person on the wheel was just not realising her light was green and she realised it as I came to her. Nothing wrong happened but it still pisses me off that people are not concentrated on their driving. If anything had happened I'd have been responsible because she had the right of way..
Oh well, it's over now and it's time to rest a bit waiting for mick to connect.
current mood: content
current music: Born to be Wild - Steppenwolf
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| Tuesday, May 26th, 2009
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4:29 pm - Those dinos...
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2:59 pm - Prices and money
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The more it goes and the more I am careful at the prices when shopping, looking for promotions, checking if the prix per kg is really cheaper for a larger quantity or money going to the shop-card. I am even more careful as I am running low on money. I'll be happy to go back working this summer even if it's truck driving, it will bring good money (and allows myself to buy my nerdy N97 :p).
Although, I still try to buy food I like, I dont really want to eat shit because it's cheaper, ham is a good example, cheap ham is nothing but water and plastic-like pink stuff.
I got myself the last Lucky Luke comic, as I like to get myself a few things from time to time. It looks like in france, comics are considered as "collectors items" because they really arent cheap: 8€50 for that one.
Got 1€00 on my card today for 59€00 spent.
On other note, good apple is good.
current mood:  curious
current music: Chuck WhiteHorse - It Can't Come Soon Enough
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(comment on this)
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| Monday, May 25th, 2009
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12:45 pm - random thoughts
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Packing for the last two weeks of school, then there will be another week off (called week of rehearsal) then the exams.
Mom said we are going to Tai-Shi together after school.
XL sweating t-shirt (special "breathing" fibers) is just a bit too large for me.
In two weeks, I'll drive the bike home: 110 miles or so. Not that I might but I just have too long legs to seat correctly on it, and a special forward foot rest (5" further than normal forward controls) is 600€ without installation, no longer seat exists.
I haven't drawn in a long time, two commissions are overdue, I shall repair that very soon.
I might try to record myself singing one day, SingStar is just a game but it gave me enough confidence and so did DJ PonyHard.
I wonder if I can get my ferret to travel with my to US with the correct papers and vaccines.
If I get good grades at the final exam, mom wants to offer me a big gift.
Live long and prosper \\//.
current mood: random
current music: The Final Countdown
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tired
nerdy